Obama, along with the Congressional Democrats, should just jump off the nearest tall building en masse, right now. It will end the agony for those who thought they voted in 2008 for Hope and Change, and who knows, probably ease their own suffering as well. Since the question in Washington has clearly degenerated into: who can ruin the country sooner, the Democrats should at least out-play the Republicans for once: if you can't, or won't beat them in politics, at least try to beat them in something — crazed mass suicide, for example.

But that is probably too much to ask. We all know the Democratic Party is the party of Losers that Lose. Losing is what they do best: when they win, they lose; when they lose, they will only lose in the shabbiest, most loser-ly way they can.